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2006-05-02 @ 7:04 p.m.
busted by the fun police and more


Today at work during a really boring work-related video, I made a noise indicating boredom and then kind of rolled my eyes at "J" who had parked his ass next to me. He was supposedly enjoying it (drugs obviously), so he leaned over and kind of snorted indignantly and said, “You always think everything has to be fun!! Well, life isn’t like that!!” and then turned back towards the video.

oh. sorry. life isn’t fun and penalties will be issued if you are seen having any. Got it??

Well, since I’m very tired (you know....having fun and all), I’ve decided to just throw up a survey from Vanity Fair magazine. I found this on the last page of the magazine when I was at the doctor’s office recently and expertly, coughed, as I ripped the page out and shoved it into my purse. So I guess add, kleptomaniac, to purveyor of fun too.

What is your greatest fear?
Jeb Bush 2008. Heh! That was the answer in the magazine and a pretty funny one. My biggest fear though is never finding someone to love. And being subjected to a life without fun...apparently.

What historical figure do you identify with most?
I don’t know if she is considered historical figure exactly, but I identify with Mexican painter Frida Khalo who dealt with her pain and emotions through painting. I think she did inspiring work and lived life to its fullest despite having a broken body from an early vehicle accident.

What is your great extravagance?
Buying art supplies. Definitely.

What is your favorite journey?
I love anything to do with water, so it would probably be any boat trips I’ve taken like around San Francisco Bay, the boat tour around the Thousand Islands and my most touching and thrilling...coming into Manhattan from Staten Island and seeing the Statue of Liberty against the NYC skyline. It was awesome. I got very choked up. It was just after 9/11.

What is the most overrated virtue?
Chastity.

On what occasion do you lie?
Actually never. If I have the occasion where I HAVE to lie, I lie by not saying anything like if my mom says “Do you like my bright pink and orange pant suit and vest with the kitties?” Cut to Me...looking around. Me....flicking pieces of cat fur off my pant leg. Me....looking down at my watch. “Well, would you look at that. I think “Judge Judy” is starting, mom.”

What do you dislike about your appearance?
The fact that I’m not holding the keys to a 2006 Porsche.

What words or phrases do you most overuse?
”Fuck-a-doodle” and when I walk by Guardcat I always say, “Why are you so short and funny looking?”

What is your greatest regret?
Not stopping my Dad’s pursuit of a filipino mail order whore.

Who or what is the greatest love of your life?
I think the real question is WHERE is the greatest love of my life. He must be somewhere. Mapquest anyone??

If there is one thing I could change about myself, what would it be?
Self esteem. I would back a couple of tractor trailers up to my front door and unload all of the self esteem that has either been lost or never claimed over the last 48 years and then see what happens in my love life department.

What do you consider your greatest achievement?
That I am slowly, but surely recovering from a troubled childhood and early depression to a happier life. Doing artwork has really helped the last couple of years. I feel confident about something for the first time....EVER!

If you could choose what to come back as, what would it be?
Wassily Kandinsky’s paintbrush or my favorite cat Calliope.

What is your most treasure possession?
This picture of my Dad and I in Armstrong Woods in Northern California.



What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Knowing that George W. Bush is in charge.

Where would you like to live?
My dream is to one day own my own home with a garden and a studio to paint in. Location is optional, but after an adult lifetime of apartment living, just once I would love to be able to paint my bedroom some wonderful, rich deep color instead of that infernal apartment white with beige mini-blinds. Yarg!

What is your favorite occupation?
It used to be a writer for the New Yorker, but I guess now it would be an artist.

What is the quality you like most in a man?
Fidelity? Oh, fidelity. Absolutely.

What is the quality you like most in a woman?
Sense of humor.

What do you most value in your friends?
Sense of humor and patience.

Who are your heroes in real life?
Definitely my therapist “A”. He has stuck with me through thick (mostly paid sessions) and thin (unpaid sessions) and put up with my many moods, tears, mistakes, stubborness, flaws and still always been there for me. He’s a real gem. Thanks “A”. XOX

What are your favorite names?
Ariel. Gregory.

What is your motto?
“Reality is for people without imagination.”



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