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2006-05-31 @ 12:06 a.m.
car-tastrophy, but just a little one


I guess the Ford Tempo of Doom novenas didnít work, because today, as I was driving through the sweltering heat, I hit a mere manhole cover and busted a ball joint on my car. And oh what fun, having to abruptly grab the wheel of a car that was suddenly weaving like a drunken soldier, nearly hitting not only cars in the lane next to me, but also the cement divider that kept me from smashing into oncoming traffic. I did momentarily regain control of the car and then hit another manhole cover and went all crazy again, which had ME going a little crazy, thinking I was going to crash any second. True, its a piece of crap, but it did have precious cargo onboard (me!!) as well as one of my paintings, so I didnít want to flame out and crash on the overpass....as much as I like drama. So I slowly edged the hunk of junk over to the turn lane and delicately eased into a conveniently located Pep Boys Auto Shop. I was shaking when I stopped. My car had truly been out of control momentarily and I felt a lot of anxiety, as well as despair because I thought I was going to be able to keep my car in one piece until I sold it, but no, it just HAD to cost me money before I got rid of it. DAMN IT!!!!!!!

So I went into Pep Boys, which is not my favorite place. In fact, its among my least favorite places. Its a rip off joint from the word ďGOĒ. Iíve gone in there before and they usually quote prices about 2 times higher than anywhere else, but gah, then again my carís driving all crazy. Iím a girl alone. I didnít want to be driving down the boulevard any further with my car acting all freaky and speaking in tongues. So I had to sit for almost two hours before they looked at it. And then when they did, they came up with a list of problems longer than Paris Hiltonís list of boyfriends. Ya need this and this and this and your inspection sticker is expiring and your windshield wipers are defective. Four hundred dollahs!

WHAT-T-T????


Ok, it wasnít quite $400, it was like $367 or something like that, but WTF? The car is only still on the road because it was like blessed by the Pope via a TV commercial fercrissakes. Its an old, totally rusted out hunk of junk that I spent almost a $1000 fixing last year. Its value? Oh probably about $300. I tried not to cry because I hate crying at car places, although generally car places are where I cry the most. I did succeed in not crying, but only because it was like 100 degrees and I was hot and sweaty and ďOprahĒ was playing on a TV overhead and she was being all proactive and ď...you can do it sistah!Ē So I basically told them to step down. No 12 hour car repairs. No inspection sticker, even though its due Thursday (only because this place will totally rip me off. I have another place where I can go and at least have somewhat of a chance of not paying $9000 for repairs in order to get a frickiní sticker). Also no new windshield wipers!! Just repair the damn broken ball joint and thatís it!

Of course, once I stepped into the foyer of the store to call my mom on my cell phone, I did lose it, weeping profusely. I was trying to keep the car together until I found another one, but I guess the evil car fairy had other plans. I asked my mom if she could come get me. It was in the 90ís and extremely humid out and I didnít know how often the bus ran on the boulevard and frankly, I just wanted to be rescued. Ever feel that way? Ya get tired of dealing with stuff, so you just call someone and say ďCome get me.Ē It took my mom almost an hour to get there. Plus the store closed at six, so I ended up waiting out on the boulevard. My mom isnít the greatest on directions, so guys in cars kept slowing down when they drove by. I guess they thought I was...you know, (ahem) ďworkingĒ, as in standing there in my supposedly provocative black shorts and salmon colored tank top. Come and get it boys! Yeah, right.

So I was very happy to finally crawl into my mom's air conditioned car about 6:30. She took me for some Chinese food at the yuppie grocery store and then bought me some groceries on her food stamp card. She frequently forgets she has money on her food stamp account, so she still had almost $100 on it.

So tomorrow is going to be a hassle. I see ďAĒ at 10:15. The bus schedule doesnít quite jive with that so I might have to walk (its only 2 miles, so thats no biggie for me). And then afterwards I miss the bus home, so I might as well just head into work early. But then how am I going to get back to the car place out on the boulevard? Plus its supposed to be another scorcher tomorrow. So yes...itís fun to be me. Whee!


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