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2006-11-13 @ 4:52 p.m.
brothers and sisters: a review of the season thus far

I'm not sure why I am inclined to talk about this. I recently went from barely watching TV to hooking up an IV and sleeping with my TV in the last three weeks. I had a few shows I always watched like "Desperate Housewives" and...errr..."Desperate Housewives", but other than that, I rarely engaged in television watchery.

I am especially annoyed at myself for becoming addicted to such hair-brained things as "Dancing with the Stars" (damn, I'm going on that fricking date tomorrow night and missing the finale!! Go Mario!! Can I have your baby?) and this new show called "Brothers and Sisters". Anyone seen it? Its right guessed it...."Desperate Housewives" and is about this rich, incredibly dysfunctional family in California who hang out with each other endlessly, even though they all love/hate each other. My family is dysfunctional too. I just don't give them my address.

I've been watching it since its first episode when Dad (dashing and L.L. Beanish) died in the family swimming pool. Unfortunately I missed that part, when I inadvertently went to clean Guardcat's poop box. But of course it was repeatedly reiterated, because one of the grandkids is afraid to get in the pool after that, but then the older drug addict son, just back from Iraq, says something about heaven and jumps into the pool and then the little grand daughter jumps in too, but later almost dies from some undiagnosed diabetes because her executive mother doesn't notice that she's thirsty. But her auntie (played by Calista Flockhart) does when she babysits the kids for like 10 minutes. Calista, of course, perfectly cast, blonde, is a conservative political commentator on a pseudo-Fox type network, where she says supposedly "inflammatory" conservative type things because her emotionally smothering mother, who everyone love/hates, played by Sally Fields, took her to a peace rally or something when she was a kid once. Her departure to NYC (where evil Liberal lives. Why would a conservative talk show host move to NYC? Oh well, bygones. Plot point needed for lame family crisis) causes a big rift with her mother who purposely has a 20 foot by 20 foot family portrait taken WITHOUT her. Zing! And she then puts it up in the family entry so that Calista will see it when she walks into the house.

Oh man, who knew the Flying Nun could be so mean?

So anyways, the whole family gathers after Dad croaks in the pool. There's Calista. There's the Drug Addict Boy (my personal favorite actually). There's his Brother, who we'll only identify as the Sulky One with Low Sperm Count. There's the Gay Brother (you knew that was coming...with a Smothering Mother at the helm, didn't you?). And then there is the wonderful Rachel Griffiths from "Six Feet Under". You remember her. She was so great at playing self loathing and anger. Here she's the strong, almost healthy one. Damn.

The supposed thrusting forth mechanism of the plot is the fact that Dad sold fake stocks to his shareholders and hid $15 million dollars in some bank account in Nevada and what was that other thing? Oh yeah, he had a 25 year love affair and child with Patricia Wettig from "Thirtysomething". But she is definitely not Thirtysomething anymore. Eek. Scary looking.

Unfortunately, the whole show consists mainly of the brothers and sisters trying to hide large horrifying bits of bad news from MOM who will react in frantic anger, lashing out at everyone, blaming them for everything and never taking a shred of responsibility for anything unless somebody yells back at her and then she cries pitifully and then they feel guilty and take it back.

Hey...kinda like at my house!!

The whole family is highly oversexed incidently. Lots of guilt sex going on. And my god, Flying Nun Sally....your husband's only been dead for like 4 weeks and you're already boinking your contractor last night? Sheesh! Even I was embarrassed about that one. And then we didn't even get to see it. And it was with Treat Williams!! Damn! I couldn't believe that a TV show managed to make Treat Williams look boring. I can only remember how hot he was when he was dancing on the table in the musical "Hair", with his shirt hanging off.

Personally I think Treat was a little young for Sally Fields. I think as long as we're dragging in movie stars who haven't had a hit for a while, why not ask Calista's boyfriend Harrison Ford to guest star.

I mean, him and Sally go way back. I know, because I was there. Yes...awittykitty was on the movie set of a movie with Sally Fields and Harrison Ford long before anyone knew who Hans Solo was. I worked as an extra on a movie called "Heroes" back in the mid-1970's. I actually almost got selected to be her stand-in, if I hadn't stupidly lied about my height on my official movie extras form at the movie extra's agency. We were both petite. Dark haired. Light skinned. Same height (if I hadn't lied). Grrrr! What an idiot. I wished the woman down at the agency hadn't told me that. So I ended up only playing a part of a "crowd" watching a car race. And getting quoted in the local newspaper saying, "Yes, I'm skipping school today to be in a movie!"

I'm sure my mom would have reacted like Sally Fields, if she had known...and then possibly sought out the comfort of a boinkable contractor. But that's another story for a future episode in another season....

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Lyrics by Lennon/McCartney. All angst copyright by awittykitty