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2007-03-08 @ 1:13 p.m.
one false move and I'll cough on you!

Is there anything more fun than a severe sinus infection? I was pretty sure there wasn't last night as I was standing at my kitchen counter shoveling every pill and vitamin I had in the house into my mouth, so I would be coherent enough to go co-host my art class with Charlemagne.

I had been sleeping most of the day, although I use the word sleeping loosely. It was more like laying upside down on my bed, breathing through my mouth and coughing like I had been smoking for 40 years. And also watching Guardcat play hockey with the large pile of used Kleenex off the edge of my nightstand. And wondering why my tongue felt like a large piece of leathery beef jerky. And wishing that the throbbing pain over my right eyebrow would stop throbbing like somebody had just punched me in the face.

See why I'm a germ-a-phobe! Because stuff like THIS happens!!

So there I was about 5:45 yesterday trying to read the small print on the cold medication. Could I take it with all the other medications I take at dinner? And could I drive with it? I still have no idea since the print was so small, so I just decided to take it and hope that it didn't start taking affect until after I arrived at my destination. See, just because you're older, doesn't mean you're smarter.

So I got to the community center around 6:20 expecting to see Charlemagne swirling around like the tornado he usually is but nothing. The room was dark. WTF? So I figured he was just running late, so I just started moving some of the tables and chairs off the floor. Then its 6:30. Then its 6:40. I'm starting to get a little panicky because 1) I don't have a cell phone to call him 2) I don't have the keys to get into the closet to start setting things up and 3) HELP!!!!

Finally I heard some footsteps out on the stairs, but I knew they weren't his and I was right. They were the Kid Doctor's. When I told him what was going on he loaned me his cell phone. Rather embarrassingly, after about 5 tries I had to ask him how to actually activate the phone. So I got ahold of Charlemagne and he sounded groggy. I asked him if he remembered he was supposed to be hosting. I can't really reveal what happened next, but it was kind of alarming. Nevertheless, he had made arrangements for someone else to host, I just hadn't got the message at home because I had left so early. Arghhh!

So I finally hung up. Me and the Kid Doctor made small talk. And talk about the smallest of Small Talk. Oy! He asked me what I did for a living. I told him I was on disability. He then asked, well, what do you do all day? And I said, "Nothing". Way to go to impress the Doctor, witty!?! I think it was just because I was so sick and the cold medication was just starting to kick in, that I was so fetchingly adorable. Go me!

The other Host with the keys finally showed up and we set everything up very quickly. I was taking the money, but I have no idea if I was giving out the correct change or was doing anything correctly since I was so blurry.

We had a new model last night. Anytime its not Beaknose I'm happy. But this woman was kind of a pain in the ass. She hadn't modeled since the 1970's, which gives you an idea of her age, and she needed constant reassurance that she was doing things right. "Is this okay?" "Should I turn this way?" "Have you guys seen me on this side?" "Did I move too much?" "Can you see everything okay?" "Am I doing this right?" Shut the fruck up! Also every pose took her about 10 minutes to decide on. We got so behind that our one hour pose eventually had to be cut to 45 minutes, and we still ended late.

So I didn't get any good art out of her. And yay, she's booked again in two weeks! Can't wait!

Fortunately everyone helped us pack up afterwards. Professional Art Guy asked me to hand feed him a carrot. Woo! I don't think he knew that I was suffering from an illness just one peg down from the bubonic plague. At the snack break Zue had been all freaked out that I was handling the food. But I had just thoroughly washed my hands and for crissakes woman, I was just ripping open bags of tortilla chips.

So I am still sick today. I still can't breathe and my poor nose is totally raw and really sore. My sinus headache isn't quite as bad. I did have to cancel an appointment with my case manager today. Its only about 8 degrees outside and I decided its probably best to just snuggle under the covers with Guardcat and eat some chicken soup which, as we speak, is just coming to a boil.

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Lyrics by Lennon/McCartney. All angst copyright by awittykitty