2006-01-24 @ 11:34 p.m.
I recently found a British website that had some absolutely amazing trivia about...
Who knew? Unfortunately their large stunning graphic couldn't quite fit into my svelte website, so I decided to just filch the jaw droppingly interesting trivia info, because I just know you've been clearing your calendar for the next edition of the incredibly
Snort....like I'd really have to. I only live a quarter mile from a Target store where they sell Diet Coke with lime. Get real. Camels? Aren't they like in Egypt or something?
Oh my goodness, this is just patently untrue. I'm very jumpy. You can ask my shrink. I mean, you come up behind me at my cubical when I'm secretly looking at diaryland during work hours, and you'll really see me jump. Hoo boy!
I really wanted to keep this under wraps because Lord know, George Bush will probably want to sink an oil well into my freakin' forehead or something. But yes, its true. You can plug your appliances into me and they'll get turned on immediately. What? You don't believe me?
I think they may have me confused with Martha Stewart and I think the iciness might be closer 80%, to be honest.
Yes, its true. I share a birthday with ALL OF YOU and expect a present from each and every one of you on your birthdays. Its only fair since I'm omnipotent. Do you know how much energy it takes to be omnipotent AND run TVs for 23 hours a day. You think I have time to go shopping for all YOUR dumb birthday presents?? Sheesh!
"Indistinguishable from those of humans...." Hmmm. My mom used to tell me that she had picked me off a mango tree out in the yard, when I was a kid. And now with no fingerprints, what the makings of a perfect murde...ummm, heh, heh, never mind, mom.
Climbed or mounted? (only in your dreams, dear delusional witty, only in your dreams)
Matins, lauds, prime, terce, sext... What are these? Names for Gwyneth Paltrow's next baby?
If you're peeling awittykitty, I hope its not a scene from "Silence of the Lambs". Yeeks.
"What's on your iPod, dude?"
Lyrics by Lennon/McCartney. All angst copyright by awittykitty