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2006-02-24 @ 10:46 p.m.
snowmo erectus

Well, heh, this is a little embarrassing. And I swear to god, I had absolutely nothing to do with it. I wasn't making some artistic statement or making a stand for freedom of speech or trying to push to the limits as to what you can display on your own property. I'm just an innocent bystander. Honest! But I do think that there would probably be protests if the general public could see what I can see from my bedroom window. I mean, Christians and right-wingers would be showing up, left and right, with signs and placards calling it pornography. Media from all over the country, if not the world, would be here filming this if even one person reported their displeasure at seeing this in someone's front yard. But I've actually been really fascinated with it, especially since its so very tall. And so well constructed. And dare say I....particularly during this cold very, very firm.

So what am I talking about? Well, I'm talking about this rather interesting snow sculpture in my neighbors front yard, across the street. It stands about 5 feet tall....3 feet in circumference and it totally dominates the front yard with its icy magnificence. Fortunately there is a fence around the yard, because I'm sure if there wasn't, there might be vandalism or something. Or someone might even get the harebrained idea to try and jump the fence and lick the damn thing and that would truly be a mistake. Why? Because can you imagine getting your tongue stuck on a 5 foot tall Snow Penis?

Oh, the misery! Owwwchh.

So yeah, we have a 5 foot tall snow penis in the yard across the street. I guess it is a little unusual, especially since we usually only get an occasional little generic snow man with a carrot nose and stick arms around these parts. But not us. We've got style. We're cutting edge. And I guess its safe to say, nothing can really prepare you for the sight of a large icy phallic tribute to manhood right in the middle of a scenic New England village. Nothing.

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