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2006-01-16 @ 1:16 p.m.
the cat who wanted to be on Broadway

You would think a cat dreaming of a career on Broadway would want to be in say, a show like, I don't know, "CATS" or something, but not Guardcat. She's different. She wants to be the lead. She wants to be able to sing music and lyrics by Andrew Lloyd Webber and I don't have the heart to tell her, that when she sings she sounds like a bag full of screaming hamsters. Why? Because I'm a supportive Mom. I want her to succeed in whatever she choses. So when she asked if she sat near my "Evita" poster, would she learn the entire score by mere osmosis, I just proudly shook my head, amazed that an animal with a brain the size of 4 grapes had such an incredible grasp of the English language.

Good kitty!

But then she started bugging me about taking her down to New York City for auditions. I didn't want to break her heart by telling her that they probably wouldn't cast a slightly overweight, neurotic cat who jumps in the air sideways everytime a piece of lint falls on her tail, as the star of a 3 million dollar musical revival. Plus I don't even know if there were any new "Evita" revivals coming out anyways.

Note to self: Ask my friend "G" in NY, if they're remounting any all-cat revivals of "Evita".

He would know for sure, because he's my Broadway connection and the poster that Guardcat is bravely protecting on the floor of my bedroom is actually from a show he directed at his high school back in California. It was a spectacular show, by high school standards, and a pretty damn great one in general. And they had rented the real costumes from a production company, so it wasn't like a GAP t-shirt with rhinestones on it. And Guardcat has really taken a shine to my new tiara anyways. I actually think that's what gave her the idea that she would make a great dictator. Getting to wear a tiara. What cat doesn't want to wear jewels while she's ruling an apartment full of mice and neurotic room mates?

So I told her I would look into the audition thing. And she's continuing to vocalize and singing scales and practicing to look regal. And I say, never crush the dream of anybody you live with...because maybe someday you'll be living off their royalty checks. :-)

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Lyrics by Lennon/McCartney. All angst copyright by awittykitty